The Fragility of Life

In a scene from a reality show, an elderly woman, who lives in a retirement community, receives a visit from 2 strangers. They want to return personal photos that belonged to the woman.  They had found them in a desk they had purchased. This story is touching and had the intended effect, but the sweet woman's very simple and powerful  statement  "My daughter came to visit last week...she doesn't live close and she's busy with her own life so she doesn't visit very often. I miss her and wish I could see her" brought me to tears. I mean big huge rolling streams that took a few minutes to get under control.

How profound! It resonated deeply within my heart. I was reminded of my own mama and how far away she is. Although she is not in a retirement home and lives independently, I've been told that she says much the same thing throughout the year. Due to the multi-state distance, it's not easy to visit  in person more than once a year.  So many times, we don't realize, and in many instances, don't care, how much these visits and interactions with the elderly, family and friends really mean. I am guilty of thinking it's "just a visit." No one wants to think about it on a deep level, because then you have to actually invest in acknowledging the truth about the impact you have in someone's life.

I remember, vividly, my last visit and conversation with my grandma - the day before she went home to be with my grandpa...she told me she missed him and that she was tired. She also told me to always be there for my mama, that she needed me to be there since she, my grandma, was going home. I simply laughed, hugged her and told her she was already home. It never entered my mind that she knew she was at the end of her amazing and beautiful life. I took it for granted that she would still be there the next morning when I brought the kids over for breakfast (our Saturday morning ritual; established when I moved back to Indiana). She was my best friend and the inspiration that drove me to overcome what life had thrown at me. Letting her go and then allowing myself to begin to process and understand the lessons in all of that was one of the hardest times of my life. 

While there were other promises I've upheld and delivered for her, I promised I would carry on her loving ways and to always be kind to people. She never took anything for granted. She cherished her relationships and took care of them. Her love for people, taking the time needed to make them feel important, and her loving acceptance of everyone, without reservations or judgement; was the legacy she left with me.  

It's been almost 20 years since she made her journey home to be with my grandpa. Fast forward to 2014. Our 4 grown children are living lives they have chosen, I'm still happily married to my own superman, and I see the fragility of life swirling all around me. I strive every day to not take life for granted, but to be fully present in each and every interaction, and yet I watch others plow through moments as if we are all immortal and will live forever. My heart breaks as I observe these instances. 

Life is fragile. If we can break it, we can heal it. With sincere attention, compassion, and love in the purest form, life will thrive. A touch, a smile, a hug, an offer to help. Every act, big or small is important and always noticed. Will you join me in actively being present so that life's moments are cherished and  fragile lives are preserved; not taken for granted?